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The MLS Roster Freeze Has Come: An Analysis of Tom Soehn's Strategy

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From July 14, 2011 until September 15, 2011 (MLS roster freeze)

Players Out
DF Mouloud Akloul
MF Terry Dunfield
DF Blake Wagner
DF/MF Wes Knight

Players In
noooooooooobody

Roster Spots Available That Weren't Filled
Three

Total 2011 Salary Cap Relief From Releasing Wes Knight, Mouloud Akloul, and Blake Wagner (Hey, That's Three Guys!)
$0

Number of Games Played at Right Back By Jeb Brovsky or John Thorrington
I refuse to count but too damned many.

Assets Received for Terry Dunfield
Allocation money and the MLS rights to a 17-year-old who doesn't want to play for Vancouver unless he has no other option.

Number of Games Played in Midfield by Peter Vagenas
Shut up.

Why Did We Need That Allocation Money Again?
Because we gave up a buttload of our existing allocation money to bring in Jordan Harvey.

Wow, Jordan Harvey's Terrible! We Must Have Been Really Desperate. Why Did We Need Jordan Harvey?
Because Tom Soehn moved Alain Rochat, the best left back in Major League Soccer, to centre back.

Why Did Alain Rochat Move to Centre Back?
Because the Whitecaps were short a centre back after releasing Mouloud Akloul for no reason then completely failing to replace him.

Isn't Bilal Duckett a Centre Back?
Now you're just trying to piss me off.