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A Memorandum Regarding Nicknames

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With the seemingly inevitable announcement that Stephen Hart will be made permanent head coach of the Canadian men's national team, it is time to sort something out once and for all: the two competing nicknames for the Canadian team under Stephen Hart, both of which saw use in the Gold Cup from those of us with nothing else to do:

  • Hart's Army: recalls a crappy American 2002 movie named "Hart's War" starring crappy American Bruce Willis in which a bunch of crappy Americans do a bunch of crappy things. Almost unanimously disliked.
  • The Hart Foundation: a legendary Canadian wrestling stable starring great Canadian even-people-who-hate-wrestling-have-heard-of-him Bret Hart, a man so secure in his masculinity that he not only spent decades rolling around on a mat with well-built men but wore pink tights while he was doing it. Revered by people who revere such things.

Done and done. The Hart Foundation it is.

Of course, this is all assuming that Stephen Hart's first act isn't to make Ben Knight's day by bringing in Port Vale's backroom staff to assist him, or we'll have to call it the Hart and Stoke Foundation.